A whole new world!

March 27, 2011: It was a cold season when the plane landed at LAX International Airport. Excited and nervous at the same time... A whole new world for me and my family...

Honey, you made my life complete.

April 08, 2010: Today marks our 5 years of togetherness with my hubby. I never felt contented and excited about life until I found him. I feel very blessed that God made me a better person because of him. God never missed to give us blessings everyday, but the most important ones are our 2 little girls who made our life more complete.

As I passed by the bookstore, I saw this perfect card for him. Let me quote the words:

For years there was an empty space inside me

that was shaped just like you.

I tried to fill it woth other things

and other people,

but nothing really fit.

It wasn't until

you came unexpectedly into my life

that I realized the space was yours,

and it could only be filled

by your laughter,

your warmth,

your tenderness and love...

(here's the best part)

I was okay before you came along.

My life was full and

I had people I cared about

and who cared about me.

But the space was always there...

always empty

waiting for you.

Now I am more...

more okay, more full, more complete

because you came into my life

and fit so perfectly into that space.

You are my completion

and my forever love.

Happy Anniversary Honey.

And so I dedicate this blog to my husband, my bestfriend, my everything and the only man in my life, Mr. Philip Israel C. Noza! My life won't be complete without you. I am blessed beyond anything I could imagine.

Finally, we brought Carl home!!!

After 47 days of staying at the hospital, we finally brought Carl home last Tuesday, March 29, 2010. No need to undergo the and 5th 4th operation but of course, he must continue his medications, he needs to be checked from time to time atleast twice a week and need to start the therapy but depends if the doctor allows him already because there's still some fresh wounds. What important is he's spending the long weekend at home. Thanks for all our friends who helped us (in so many ways -- you know who you are!) and also thanks for my hubby who never left me from the very first day the accident happened.

Day 36: Still in the Hospital

Today is my brother's 36th day at the Hospital. He had his 2nd operation last February 23 and his 3rd operation last March 10. We're still waiting for the doctor's advise if he still needs to undergo 4th and 5th operation. As of today, he's been taking a lot of vitamins and antibiotics because doctor said that there's a "light growth of staphylococcis aureus infection". He also have 2 dextrose on his left arm. Hubby and I will visit him this Saturday and talk to his doctor. Hope everything will turn out well...

Day 6: Miracle Happened!

February 16:

Motto: Never give up! After our visit to Tagaytay, I called up my medical friends, send them the Xray pictures. Hubby was helping me too. He sent some pictures to their resident doctor, Dr. Calado, told him that the doctors in Olongapo was planning to fuse Carl's leg. He told my hubby to advise the doctor not to fuse the leg/limb and also advised him to consider Ilisarov procedure.

Ilisarov procedure (Wikipedia) is used in surgiforcal procedures to lengten and reshape the limb bones; treat complex and/or open bone fractures; and in cases of infected non-unions of bones that are not amenable with other techniques."

Dr. Calado told hubby to tell my brother's Orthopedic doctor not to fuse the limb. He even told hubby that if they cannot do that in Olongapo then we have to send my brother here in Manila (PGH). He said that PGH has expertise in Ilisarov procedure. So when I heard about that, I googgled it and found 134,000 results. I gatheres some data and then called up carl's doctor and told him not to amputate the leg. Maybe he can consider that procedure. I kept on calling him and texting him from 0530H until he called me at 1430H the same day. Guess what? He talked so differently. He said he will not do bone fusion anymore, that there still hope that he can bend his legs and be functional again in the future. Whew!!! MIRACLES DO HAPPEN (?) or if you don't know anything about the procedure, just say YES to whatever the doctor tells you because you're staying at the ward??? But I do believe MIRACLES DO HAPPEN... Just pray...

4th Day: One on one talk with God

February 15, 2010

We decided to go to Pink Sisters in Tagaytay to seek help (45 mins. away from our place). It has been tested, almost all my wishes/petition came true with the help of the sisters. I need miracles.

We attended the afternoon mass at 430pm. After the mass, I prayed the rosary and then had a little talk with our Lord. It was mixed emotions... I felt pity with my brother, I'm loosing hope, I missed my mom... I don't know what to do. I am the only family of Carl that can help him. I have a lot of questions running thru my mind but I never dared to question Him. Never dared to test my faith. The only thing that I told HIM was: "Whatever your plans may be, I will leave it all up to You."

3rd day at the Hospital: Very bad and sad news!

February 13, 2010, Saturday:

It was exactly 8 o'clock in the morning while my brother was having his breakfast, he was very excited in telling us that he had a chance to walk again normally when his surgeon arrived and talked to us (me and my hubby) privately. Because Carl was so positive about his operations, we were also excited to hear the good news from his doctor but unfortunately has a different side of the story. We first spoke to the him and he showed us the x-ray result of my brother. He even showed us the actual picture when my brother arrived at the emergency room. It was not only broken but crashed bones. The bones were scattered in the area where they met the accident. A lot of blood was lost and he said that was my brother's. Have you seen a leg without a knee? That's how it looks like or even worse. I can't exactly describe it but it was yulky! I almost fell and threw up.

The next part was when his Ortho came and talked to us too. He said, the good news is that they will not amputate the leg anymore because the nerves are still functional. He said there are 5 signs to consider before the decide to amputate the leg: the bone or the knee cap, veins (which was cut off too due to injury), the patella, the skin and the tissue that no longer has an adequate blood supply. But, the nerves are still functional so they decided to just fuse it (leg-knee fusion).

For those of us who are not familiar with that term, in lay man's term (as I understood) is that they are going to remove the knee joint by connecting the leg bones and thigh bones (?). The left leg will be smaller than the right leg and it is a permanent procedure. You could not bend it anymore...as long as you live. As you can see at the X-ray picture, you cannot detect where the knee joint anymore. At first, I was convinced that it was the best way instead of amputating it. So... it's only me who can tell that news to my brother.

Carl and I talked... It's hard for me to give advise because I myself was not convinced that I cannot anymore bend my legs... I even tried walking without bending my knees. It's hard... I prayed before I talked to him. I told him that we are still fortunate that the doctors have decided not to amputate the leg anymore but.... (silence) they will have to fuse it. He was in tears. I cannot hide anymore how sorry I was while talking to him, i burst into tears. I hugged him and told him that everything will be alright just pray. Prayer is the most powerful than anything else in the world. I told my brother that I will never leave him whatever happens. I will always be by his side. I will do anything for him... it was a long silence... I knew he was very depressed. He doesn't want to eat anymore but when I told him that God will never give us his cross that we can't carry...