Honey, you made my life complete.

April 08, 2010: Today marks our 5 years of togetherness with my hubby. I never felt contented and excited about life until I found him. I feel very blessed that God made me a better person because of him. God never missed to give us blessings everyday, but the most important ones are our 2 little girls who made our life more complete.

As I passed by the bookstore, I saw this perfect card for him. Let me quote the words:

For years there was an empty space inside me

that was shaped just like you.

I tried to fill it woth other things

and other people,

but nothing really fit.

It wasn't until

you came unexpectedly into my life

that I realized the space was yours,

and it could only be filled

by your laughter,

your warmth,

your tenderness and love...

(here's the best part)

I was okay before you came along.

My life was full and

I had people I cared about

and who cared about me.

But the space was always there...

always empty

waiting for you.

Now I am more...

more okay, more full, more complete

because you came into my life

and fit so perfectly into that space.

You are my completion

and my forever love.

Happy Anniversary Honey.

And so I dedicate this blog to my husband, my bestfriend, my everything and the only man in my life, Mr. Philip Israel C. Noza! My life won't be complete without you. I am blessed beyond anything I could imagine.

Finally, we brought Carl home!!!

After 47 days of staying at the hospital, we finally brought Carl home last Tuesday, March 29, 2010. No need to undergo the and 5th 4th operation but of course, he must continue his medications, he needs to be checked from time to time atleast twice a week and need to start the therapy but depends if the doctor allows him already because there's still some fresh wounds. What important is he's spending the long weekend at home. Thanks for all our friends who helped us (in so many ways -- you know who you are!) and also thanks for my hubby who never left me from the very first day the accident happened.

Day 36: Still in the Hospital

Today is my brother's 36th day at the Hospital. He had his 2nd operation last February 23 and his 3rd operation last March 10. We're still waiting for the doctor's advise if he still needs to undergo 4th and 5th operation. As of today, he's been taking a lot of vitamins and antibiotics because doctor said that there's a "light growth of staphylococcis aureus infection". He also have 2 dextrose on his left arm. Hubby and I will visit him this Saturday and talk to his doctor. Hope everything will turn out well...

Day 6: Miracle Happened!

February 16:

Motto: Never give up! After our visit to Tagaytay, I called up my medical friends, send them the Xray pictures. Hubby was helping me too. He sent some pictures to their resident doctor, Dr. Calado, told him that the doctors in Olongapo was planning to fuse Carl's leg. He told my hubby to advise the doctor not to fuse the leg/limb and also advised him to consider Ilisarov procedure.

Ilisarov procedure (Wikipedia) is used in surgiforcal procedures to lengten and reshape the limb bones; treat complex and/or open bone fractures; and in cases of infected non-unions of bones that are not amenable with other techniques."

Dr. Calado told hubby to tell my brother's Orthopedic doctor not to fuse the limb. He even told hubby that if they cannot do that in Olongapo then we have to send my brother here in Manila (PGH). He said that PGH has expertise in Ilisarov procedure. So when I heard about that, I googgled it and found 134,000 results. I gatheres some data and then called up carl's doctor and told him not to amputate the leg. Maybe he can consider that procedure. I kept on calling him and texting him from 0530H until he called me at 1430H the same day. Guess what? He talked so differently. He said he will not do bone fusion anymore, that there still hope that he can bend his legs and be functional again in the future. Whew!!! MIRACLES DO HAPPEN (?) or if you don't know anything about the procedure, just say YES to whatever the doctor tells you because you're staying at the ward??? But I do believe MIRACLES DO HAPPEN... Just pray...

4th Day: One on one talk with God

February 15, 2010

We decided to go to Pink Sisters in Tagaytay to seek help (45 mins. away from our place). It has been tested, almost all my wishes/petition came true with the help of the sisters. I need miracles.

We attended the afternoon mass at 430pm. After the mass, I prayed the rosary and then had a little talk with our Lord. It was mixed emotions... I felt pity with my brother, I'm loosing hope, I missed my mom... I don't know what to do. I am the only family of Carl that can help him. I have a lot of questions running thru my mind but I never dared to question Him. Never dared to test my faith. The only thing that I told HIM was: "Whatever your plans may be, I will leave it all up to You."

3rd day at the Hospital: Very bad and sad news!

February 13, 2010, Saturday:

It was exactly 8 o'clock in the morning while my brother was having his breakfast, he was very excited in telling us that he had a chance to walk again normally when his surgeon arrived and talked to us (me and my hubby) privately. Because Carl was so positive about his operations, we were also excited to hear the good news from his doctor but unfortunately has a different side of the story. We first spoke to the him and he showed us the x-ray result of my brother. He even showed us the actual picture when my brother arrived at the emergency room. It was not only broken but crashed bones. The bones were scattered in the area where they met the accident. A lot of blood was lost and he said that was my brother's. Have you seen a leg without a knee? That's how it looks like or even worse. I can't exactly describe it but it was yulky! I almost fell and threw up.

The next part was when his Ortho came and talked to us too. He said, the good news is that they will not amputate the leg anymore because the nerves are still functional. He said there are 5 signs to consider before the decide to amputate the leg: the bone or the knee cap, veins (which was cut off too due to injury), the patella, the skin and the tissue that no longer has an adequate blood supply. But, the nerves are still functional so they decided to just fuse it (leg-knee fusion).

For those of us who are not familiar with that term, in lay man's term (as I understood) is that they are going to remove the knee joint by connecting the leg bones and thigh bones (?). The left leg will be smaller than the right leg and it is a permanent procedure. You could not bend it anymore...as long as you live. As you can see at the X-ray picture, you cannot detect where the knee joint anymore. At first, I was convinced that it was the best way instead of amputating it. So... it's only me who can tell that news to my brother.

Carl and I talked... It's hard for me to give advise because I myself was not convinced that I cannot anymore bend my legs... I even tried walking without bending my knees. It's hard... I prayed before I talked to him. I told him that we are still fortunate that the doctors have decided not to amputate the leg anymore but.... (silence) they will have to fuse it. He was in tears. I cannot hide anymore how sorry I was while talking to him, i burst into tears. I hugged him and told him that everything will be alright just pray. Prayer is the most powerful than anything else in the world. I told my brother that I will never leave him whatever happens. I will always be by his side. I will do anything for him... it was a long silence... I knew he was very depressed. He doesn't want to eat anymore but when I told him that God will never give us his cross that we can't carry...

First Operation

February 12, 2010:

First operation. His orthopaedic doctor decided to do the first operation after the accident becauase they need to clean up the wound and try to save the leg and not to amputate it. It took 2 hours to put an implant called external fixator device. External fixation (from Wikipedia) is a surgical treatment used to set bone fractures in which a cast would not allow proper alignment of the fracture. In this kind of reduction, holes are drilled into uninjured areas of bones around the fracture and special bolts or wires are screwed into the holes.

We haven't had the chance to talk to the Orthopaedic Doctor after the surgery.

2nd day at the hospital: Disaster!

February 11, 2010:

I didn't get enough sleep because I was still worried about my brother. My hubby was very supportive of me that he went to Olongapo with me to visit and support my brother. We arrived there early in the morning and was so scared and as if there were butterflies on my stomach and when I was infront of the James Gordon Hospital, I am afraid to go inside, afraid of what I am going to see. With the help of hubby, I finally reached the Orthopaedic Ward where he lies, sleeping.

I felt very sad and depressed on what happened to him. His face and body was full of scars and bruises, and his left leg was still bleeding eventhough it was wrapped in a bandage. The bed sheets and the hospital dress has still blood stains from the accident. The worst part was that nobody's there, not one relative, even my father, wasn't there to support him. The only person who was on his side since the hospital called my father was a friend/neighbor. My heart melted and was about to burst into tears when suddenly he woke up... I hugged him never ask anything at first. I can feel the pain that he was suffering. He knows that whenever he did anything wrong, my mouth won't stop talking like an M-16 armalite, but this time it's different. It happened and it will never be the same again.

After the short silence, Anne, his friend told me that he needed 8 bags of type B blood immediately. She said that the doctors couldn't perform the 1st operation because his hemoglobin was too low. I don't know what to do. Never in my life that I have donated blood because I'm anemic. Hubby was the one who volunteered first though his blood type is A+ and of course, I am the sister so I also went there to donate (but I'm Type O). We went to the blood bank immediately but unfortunately, they cannot accept it in exchange with the type B blood (which you have to pay Php1,500 even if you have a donor) because there was no Type B blood available. I have no choice but to call up some of my friends. One particular person was Norie Joe. He was the one who contacted our batchmates. After an hour, hubby and I went to meet them at the mall where we found Jordan Arenas who was willing to donate his Type B blood for the very first time. I was surprised and very thankful because we have never been that close when we were in Highschool. And would like to thank Ariel Go for sending 4 more people to donate blood (but unfortunately they had restrictions.. some are drunk, others have tatoo so the blood bank rejected them) but atleast Ariel was there and was trying to help. And of course Norie Joe who was the one who called all of them at that time. 3 from Carl's friend also donated blood. We collected 5 plus we bought 3 from the Red Cross.

Upon completing the blood bags which took us a whole day, a surgeon talked to us that they needed to put a fixature to my brother's leg. He told us that that it is possible for them to amputate my brother's leg and we will be needing a big amount of money for the 5 operations. He showed us the video and the picture. It was a disaster. I cried but didn't told my brother yet because he was full of hopes... that everything will be back to normal. False hopes (?) I keep on praying and helping myself to be brave infront of him. He was still in pain... They scheduled the first operation on a Saturday...

A Motorcycle Accident

February 10, 2010:

Just as my hubby and I finished the Novena Mass at Baclaran Church when I noticed that I have a missed call and a text saying "Call me, immediately." Upon reading the text message, I hurriedly texted my brother if what is the concern of my father. After 5 minutes of waiting for the reply, i called my father. My brother, Carl, met a terrible motorcycle accident at the zigzag road near Kale Beach in Olongapo City. I was shattered... Didn't know what to do... I finished everything at work until night time.. That was my last day at work with my former Section, before transferring to my new Department (Feb. 14, 2010)

Oh noh! Our little Trishia got sick!!!

It took me this long to continue my blog on our Hongkong Adventure due to unforseen circumstance that had happened last weekend. I only got 4 days left in our office before transferring to my new job (actually I assume work for me here in my current job and there will be the same). Athough not required, I wanted to finish my project before leaving my current job and so I stayed late for work last Friday, February 5, 2010 not knowing that my little Trishia is already sick. I called home around at 530pm just to inform our househod help that I will be late and will just finish 3 more pages of my project. And then she told me that Trishia's having diarrhea and it is her 8th time already from the time we left the house. And so upon hearing that, I wrapped up already and we hurriedy ran to the car. While hubby was driving, I called them again to get ready because we're going to Trishia's pedia to check on her.

Hubby and I decided to go straight to Perpetual Help Hospital in Las Pinas because they won't entertain you until you have your name listed in their notebook (what a crap). You need to go there physically to write the name of the patient. And after doing so, we fetch the kids and the yayas and hurriedly went off to the hospital. We haven't talked to the doctor yet but she already knew the problem. Dra. Principe checked her skin and told us that our little Trishia was already dehydrated. She also said that Trishia needs to be confined for atleast 2 nights. Hubby and were shocked! At first we talked to the doctor and asked if there's anymore options rather than having her confined and giving her IV. Actually, we don't have anymore problems with the confinement because our new Healthcard is better than the last one but what we worry about is that our youngest baby is going to have an IV for 3 days!!! OMG!!! But the doctor said it would be hard for the nurses/ doctors to see her vein if she'll be dehydrated. As a mom, I cried... This was the first time that I will be having one of my daughters be confined in the hospital for 3 days. I did not say any word to the doctor and just brought my daughter to the emergency room half-heartedly. I don't have a choice. I need to be with her along with my husband. I was trying to be brave eventhough a lot of kids were crying because of pain due to the needle that was injected into their fragile body. I tried to route my attention to the Bejeweled Blitz (a game) on my iphone and at the same time putting an earphone to my daughter's ears so she couldn't hear the loud scream of the other children.

We stayed at the emergergency room for almost 2 hours waiting for a vacant room and not to mention my hubby is trying to delay the nurses from putting IV on Trishia's left hand (hehehe). I know deep inside that he also doesn't want Trishia to be confined but he's not talking about it. So when the doctor and the nurses came to give her the IV, he had nothing to do but to held Trishia tight and to divert her from the pain that might caused her. While me and her dad were nervous, we noticed that Trishia didn't have any reactions. She even talked to the nurse. My little Trishia made us stronger. Maybe she doesn't want to see mommy crying.

We then proceeded to our room at about 8pm. Luckily Trishia doesnt mind her hand with a tube attached to it for the IV fluid. At about an hour, she fell asleep. So my husband went back to our house to send Peachy back home with the yayas and for my husband to get some clothes for the duration of the stay. We are expecting to be at the hospital for three days. Husband and I took turns in guarding Trishia during the night.

On Saturday, with two full bottle of IV consumed, Trishia went back to her usual self and all replenished. She become her usual self once again to our relief. During the stay we are contented with eating fast food takeouts. Hoping that the next day will be the time we will be checking out. We were visited by our officemate/friend Brin and Eds and husband Dwight. Eds and Dwight are living in Valenzuela and seeing them makes us treasure more our true friendship. And late a night, her doctor gave us recommendation for discharge. What a relief.

The next day, Sunday, we prepared early morning and pack up. We finished everything, including the bills by 12. We were so hungry and having the thought of losing this weekend and spending it at the hospital makes us even hungrier. So the family decided to eat at, what else, than Mesa in Greenbelt. as if nothing happened, Trishia once again is happy walking and running at the mall.

HongKong Adventure Part 1

The family is very excited leading up to our short and exciting vacation to Hongkong. And the day finally arrived. We woke up early last Sunday, January 24 to be in the airport. Cebu Pacific's airline is departing from the new Centennial Terminal 3 terminal. Alright, the airport is not actually new "new" but it is obviously the latest airport in Manila. I'm sure it is bigger than the Terminal 2 where Philippine Airlines hold their domestic and international flights. The terminal 3 once operational will inherit all the other airlines at the Old NAIA terminal. So much for the airport. However, we have to point out that there are less hangers-on here and less well wishers or maybe we are early as we are already at the airport by 5-530 in the morning.

We checked in at the counter and there we spotted our travelmates/friends Lara and his husband, Jun and son Cuzz. We planned to have the same flight and same hotel. We encountered no problem at the check-in counter except that we have to turn around again after checking in the luggage to pay the Airport Fee and Travel Tax. So for all Cebu Pacific buyers, yes the ticket is all inclusive but at the airport you still must pay International Travel Tax and Airport Fee if your traveling outside of the coutry. Good thing we dont have to pay for Trisha as she is still free as a minor. However, it will be half for Peachy.

We are going through the process and inspection and we didnt realize that it is already time to board the plane. Well, before doing that, our stomach's are aching and shouting for "food" so we stop at a nearby food stall at the airport and as usual as all other airports, their prices is "airport price" that means it is expensive! imagine a bottle of water for 50 pesos where you can buy it at 10 pesos outside. Good thing we brought breads for the kids. After finishing up our food, we went straight to the plane. Since we have check-in our 2 strollers, we dont have a choice but to carry our heavy little princesses to the plane.

Peachy was seated at the window so she got the best seat in the plane with her view of Manila. She enjoyed it now more than the first plane flight she took when we went to Thailand in 2007. Trisha is seated alternately with us. We first heard Trisha singing with a familiar tune. Not too long that we realized that she is already singing the Manny Villar's campaign ad/song. We are all laughing when we realize that. Manny Villlar is flooding the TV and radio with his ad that even children can memorize his song. Lots of money(million) to spend and burn just for a commercial, just to be a President. Well, it's not surprising anymore.. he is one of the richest man in Asia. After two hours in the air, we finally arrive in HK. The main purpose of our trip is of course to bring the children to Disneynald and enjoy bonding moments. We arrived about 10 minutes earlier than expected so when we are done with immigration, we are all hungry for lunch. What a sight when we spotted a Burger King restaurant at the airport. I know you are asking why eat BK at HK when all the authentic chinese food will be there. I have a better answer for you 1. We love BK 2. It is safer to eat something that you already know and your tounge already knew. 3. This is the airport so fast food must come really fast. And it is already 12 noon and we still dont know how to get to the Hotel.

After consulting with our travelmate, we all decided to ride the Airport Shuttle Train or the Octopus Train to have a better view of the city and to have a safer ride which we had a little regret later on compared to riding in a taxi. So we purchased train card for each one of us. We thought that this Octopus pass can also be used in free train ride when we transfer but we found out too late that we can not. But don't get us wrong we enjoyed the hassle free ride at the train as it is not crowded and the view is great and the train is modern. We are in Kowloon in less than 30 minutes. Now how do we locate the hotel? We thought that from the station we can walk our way towards the hotel but we are wrong. We need to transfer station and pay again. We asked two HK nationals and we are asked to pay 60HK dollar each. We are getting suspicious to we walked away from them. After asking again we realized that there is a free shuttle bus from the train. Argh! we have to drag again our luggages and strollers to the bus at the end of the Station. They said that we have to go down at Park Hotel and from there we can already trace Guandong Hotel. It is really hard where nobody can speak straight English to you. We walked and walked until we saw somebody with a map who can help us. What a relief when we found out that we are just one block apart from the hotel where we will be staying. We are tired with the travel that we hurriedly went to the hotel. We immediately checked-in and zoom to our room where we lay in bed temporarily.

A Blessed 2009

Another year has ended... Last year was a very meaningful, fruitful and a blessed year for me and my family. We've been to a lot of trials and challenges but those trials made me and my family stronger and more intact. But of course, we also received a lot of blessings too...

FRIENDS: I am very thankful that the Lord has given me friends. I have a few but those few are the ones that won't leave you whatever happens. They are the ones that I can proudly say that can be TRUSTED and won't backstub you. Friends that will pull you up when you're down. Friends that even you don't that often, you know in your heart that they are always there for you... You know who you are and I am thankful that I have you.

FATHER: I am thankful that although the Lord has taken my mom while I was younger, I still have my dad. Though he's far away from me, we still have time to see text each other, call each other and see each other. Love you papa!

BROTHER: My only sibling. He's far away from me too but never be the hindrance to not see each other atleast once in two months. We never fail to text each other everyday.

DAUGHTERS: I am blessed to have a cute and cuddly little girls. They are growing up real fast. They are now getting so makulit but they give us happiness which money cant buy. Besides, there are lots of people who havent have children yet and they wish they have one already.

HUBBY: And of course I am very lucky to have a very understanding and loveable hubby.

JOB: Though I dont have the perfect job, I am still thankful that it give us a source of income to supplement our needs and working with a lots of challenges makes me strive more.

Although it sounds more like a thanksgiving holiday than a lookback for the past fruitful year, we still love to mention the following things:

1. Our loving Dog Brandon who tirelessly guard our house day and night

2. Our reliable and dependable transportation of service which doesnt fail us going in and out of the office and taking us to far away places with no hassles eventhough he loves to drink premium gasoline too much.

3. Our yayas who take care of our children patiently but not those yayas which ...nevermind

4. Another accomplishment we had this year is that we never failed to go to Baclaran Church every Wednesday without misses to say the novena. Thats 52 wednesdays of 2009! whew. Hope we do it again this 2010

5. Our home which sheltered us through Ondoy floods and other typhoons that passed.

6. And lastly to God Almighty who never failed us to shower his blessings. Thank you for everything.